Transformer Tuesday #1

Through the magic of time travel (it is 2015, after all. We all have hoverboards and phone booths now) this first edition of Transformer Tuesday comes to you on a Thursday. It may also have something to do with the fact that I only invented the idea this morning and couldn’t be fussed to wait five days to implement it.

Well, yesterday (try and keep up, dear) I got a lovely package from Mr. Postman. I had to sing that old Marvelettes song before he’d give it to me, which I think is very unprofessional and tantamount to abuse. I complied only because my parcel contained a Transformer toy that I’ve literally waited some twenty-seven years to buy. It’s…… FANGRY!

Green... with evil!

Green… with evil!

I’ve been on the lookout for this toy for most of my adult life, but never came across him in the flesh, so to speak. He’s one of those Transformers that I was only aware of thanks to the Marvel UK comic. He appeared in the very final issues in 1991, where he got to look all angry and stuff before being punched through a window. Marvel found this scene to be so incredible that they put it on the cover.

For some reason I thought he was really, really cool. Maybe it was his odd green face. Maybe it was because he’s pink. Or maybe it’s because he turns into a snarling, drooling bat-werewolf.

Not just a thousand deaths. A thousand TERRIBLE deaths.

Not just a thousand deaths. A thousand TERRIBLE deaths.

The toy only superficially resembles the artwork, but I don’t care. He’s chunky and cool and vaguely reminiscent of the old He-Man toys, which is no bad thing. Oh, don’t forget that his robot head comes off and turns into a little man. Because of course it does.

Fangry is quite rare and commands a pretty penny if he’s complete. Naturally, the first thing most kids in the 80s did was pull off the head and lose it down the back of the sofa, so you can imagine how often complete examples come up for sale. It’s a shame, really, as it makes the toy desirable among collectors, which in turn raises the price asked by dealers. The cycle feeds on itself until you have someone like me who has to remortgage the house in order to play with a pink plastic werewolf.

I couldn't even afford to take my own picture

I couldn’t even afford to take my own picture

Fangry was also in the Japanese cartoon series Masterforce, where he was called “Wilder” and was not truly a giant robot from the planet Cybertron, but a young boy who was the leader of a gang called the Cool Guys before he was savagely beaten and humiliated by rival thugs the Jack Boys. This defeat led him to join the Decepticons and vow to bring destruction upon mankind.

For realsies.

“Hey, kid! You’re all right.”

The arrival of Fangry to my toy shelf has filled a hole in my collection as well as a hole in my heart. As a child, I longed for Transformer toys as some children do for a puppy for Christmas or for daddy to come back. I suppose I’ll never truly grow up, and unwrapping a funny-coloured robot will make me happy now matter how old I get.

“Play with a Pink”

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